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Hashtag too much whiskey


Remember back in 5th grade, when everyone vowed not to ever do drugs

D. I won’t do drugs. A. Won’t have an attitude. R. I will respect myself. E. I will educate me nooooOOOOoooooWwww.


You guys I’m in Disney World and this afternoon my blood sugar dropped so low I got separated from my family and somehow bought an ice cream and then blacked out and woke up on a bench with chocolate sauce all over my arms and Mickey Mouse putting a cold towel on my head this truly is a magical place.

This is my favorite thing on all of the internet

teacher:  alright fold your papers in half
entire class:  hot dog or hamburger